Alice I Have Been by Melanie Benjamin

Alice I Have Been
by Melanie Benjamin
Pub. Date: January 12, 2010
Genre: Historical Fiction
400pp

Synopsis from BN.com:
Few works of literature are as universally beloved as Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland. Now, in this spellbinding historical novel, we meet the young girl whose bright spirit sent her on an unforgettable trip down the rabbit hole–and the grown woman whose story is no less enthralling.

But oh my dear, I am tired of being Alice in Wonderland. Does it sound ungrateful?

Alice Liddell Hargreaves’s life has been a richly woven tapestry: As a young woman, wife, mother, and widow, she’s experienced intense passion, great privilege, and greater tragedy. But as she nears her eighty-first birthday, she knows that, to the world around her, she is and will always be only “Alice.” Her life was permanently dog-eared at one fateful moment in her tenth year–the golden summer day she urged a grown-up friend to write down one of his fanciful stories. That story, a wild tale of rabbits, queens, and a precocious young child, becomes a sensation the world over. Its author, a shy, stuttering Oxford professor, does more than immortalize Alice–he changes her life forever. But even he cannot stop time, as much as he might like to. And as Alice’s childhood slips away, a peacetime of glittering balls and royal romances gives way to the urgent tide of war. For Alice, the stakes could not be higher, for she is the mother of three grown sons, soldiers all. Yet even as she stands to lose everything she treasures, one part of her will always be the determined, undaunted Alice of the story, who discovered that life beyond the rabbit hole was an astonishing journey. A love story and a literary mystery, Alice I Have Been brilliantly blends fact and fiction to capture the passionate spirit of a woman who was truly worthy of her fictional alter ego, in a world as captivating as the Wonderland only she could inspire.


Why I Picked It:
It was my first read on my new ereader! I downloaded it from the library on Christmas day and thoroughly enjoyed the experience!

My Review:
I was fascinated with Alice when I was younger. I read Through the Looking Glass and Alice in Wonderland several times, and recently came upon my childhood copy of both books (which will be deposited into my daughter's room now). I have thoroughly enjoyed modern day rewritings of these tales. By that I mean the sort that Gregory Maguire has so magically written (Wicked, Confessions of an Ugly Stepsister, etc.)

Instead of delving into Wonderland, we instead meet the real Alice. I found her charming, and her "real" world and story very engaging. It's very plausible to believe that there might have been a potential love story between their neighbor, Oxford professor Charles Dodgson (aka Lewis Carroll), a storyteller who one day spun a magical tale about a young girl named Alice, and Alice, who begged him to write it down, preserving her in youthful adventure forever. I have to say that I am most grateful that it's probably been 20+ years since I've read Alice in Wonderland because I'm afraid this book will color any future readings of it. (I'll be sure to keep any opinions and commentary to myself when I read the books to Laura.)

A word about Charles Dodgson... I was more than a little creeped out by some of the narrative in the book about him. His fascination with Alice and her sisters sometimes made my mind scream "PEDOPHILE!" Especially, when he invited her alone to meet him in the garden to be his little gypsy girl, where he photographed her out of her customary Victorian dress, and instead in a flimsy piece of cloth. And again later, when he would "tremble" in her presence. So I googled him, and Ms. Benjamin postured his character carefully, didn't come right out and scream it like my mind did, but I believe she described him spot on... (read for yourself http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lewis_Carroll) You can even view the picture he took of Alice Liddell. Benjamin balances his creepiness by writing him as the one who truly seemed to understand Alice, listening, validating, encouraging her free spirit in a confining society.

So Alice's reflections on her childhood takes up nearly half of the book. I enjoyed mostly the descriptive adventure through Victorian England with it's restrictive society, bound by expectations -- it must have been terribly hard for a precocious child like Alice... And she learns full well the consequences of becoming the subject of gossip innuendo as a young woman. Ms. Benjamin captures all of that very well. Everyone in Alice's life in the novel, really existed! The mysterious ending to her friendship with Mr. Dodgson is danced around, alluded to, but never completely explained. That did keep me turning the "pages" even if I was ultimately a little disappointed. There are some real life answers no one ever knows.

Benjamin handles it all in a very detailed, vivid and fascinating way. Mr. Dodgson's story of Alice was something she never did shake throughout her life, but as the octogenarian Alice looks back upon her life, she came to terms with it. This was such a beautiful book, despite the creepy old guy. Without him, Alice might never have become who she was. This is one of those books that makes me want to read even more, so well done, Melanie Benjamin!